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Laura in Cyberland

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A Night Out
Monday, March 26, 2012
The problem:
GRoommate sat slumped on the couch, staring blankly at the floor. His long-anticipated date with Blonde Dream Girl was cancelled last-minute, by a brief, unapologetic message.

Determined to save GRoommie from a weekend of moping, I dragged him off the couch over to the mirror, where I forced his everyday un-shaggable hair comb into a spiky gelled attention-grabber. I ordered him to change clothes. It was Friday night.

“Hi ladies!!” I said to girls at the bar, after schlepping him downtown and filling him with gin and tonics. “Will you hang out with me so the guys don’t think I’m dating my roommate here?” I yanked him toward me and declared “This is GRoommie!”


The results:
I didn't mean to get labeled a puma. Groommie opened a tab at the bar. I pushed girls his way on the dance floor, until success!, he made it to first base. I beamed with pride -- best wing-woman ever!

Of course by that time, I'd had... some drinks. "Hey, will you hang out with me?" I asked the cute guy by the bar. "My roommate is making out with someone, so I don't have anyone to hang out with!"

During our conversation, the age question popped. I made him guess. "23?" Nope. "25?" Wrong. "26?" Uh-uh. Beginning to look concerned, he ventured "27??" Yeah... 27. Let's go with that. He is 21.

When my friends tried to drag me out of the bar, 21yr-old didn't want me to leave. He offered his relatively sober balance skills, so I hung onto his arm as he walked us back to my friend's car.

"Laura!!" Also intoxicated, GRoommie vied for my attention. "Lauralaura! LAAAUUURRRAAA!!"

Sigh. "What!?!"

Blank look. "Oh... I forgot."

"You forgot?" I stumbled, 21yr-old fought to keep me upright as I belted out to Groommie "Can't you see I'm busy hitting on a guy here?!"


Um. GRoommie does not remember any of the trip home. I consider that fortunate.
  4:36 PM
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Location: California, United States

No, I don't have a facebook. This blog is my web presence, and if you want to reach me, it connects to my email.

Right now, I live in the bay area, but I tend to move around a lot. Staying in one place makes me so restless.

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