Crash Landing
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Questions you would have asked if you'd seen me yesterday:(1) "Why is your arm in a sling?"
(2) "Why is your sling so ghetto?"
The answers to these questions begin with understanding Sean, and his enjoyment of motorized vehicles. Or more specifically, his tendecy to pretend to be a motorized vehicle.
Vehicle 1: Tank
I first noticed this tendency about a year ago, when Sean was in the presence of some small children. It began with him putting a kid on his shoulders, making his hands into fists, and holding those fists up near his temples. The kid would be instructed to hold onto these fists, which would make Sean's forearms similar to joysticks, much like the levers that control the two treads of a tank.
Then, "BRRRRRRRRRRR. Kachunk kaching rrrrrr wiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeee! BRRRRRRR..."
Sean would let the kid pull/push his forearm levers, and he would move around accordingly, the way he'd imagine a tank would move if the levers were put into those positions. I assumed he did it for the kid, since they usually enjoyed the tank game. Recently of course, I learned otherwise.
Vehicle 2: Airplane
This tendency evolved recently into a new form. Unlike the tank model, Sean realized that he could give airplanes to people that were bigger than small children, so long as they were significantly smaller than he. This is convenient for him, of course, because a significantly smaller person is regularly at hand for him to give airplanes to. (By 'airplane' I mean that thing where you balance someone on your feet, as if making them fly.)
Sean: Hey Laura, want another airplane?
Me: No.
Sean: Please?
Me: [sighs] I'm eating lunch.
Sean: [pouts]
Me: Ok fine. I'm going to finish my bagel, and then you can give me an airplane as soon as you've cleaned those dishes.
Sean always has a new idea for his airplane ride, that is always a surprise for his airplane passenger. The first flight, it was radio communication with the tower for take-off and landing. ("This is Tower to LC678X, repeat Tower to LC678X. You are clear for take-off.") Other scenarios included lightning, troubled radio communication, bad weather, and general turbulence. So far, all flights were successful, until the most recent idea he had, which was Crash Landing.
This wasn't a very long flight, as you can imagine. We had some troubled radio communication with the tower ("LC678X to Tower, we are having an engine problem") and ended with me unexpectedly free falling and flailing and "OWWWWW!!!"
I made him make me a sling for my right arm (without which I am completely useless) , which was all bruised up and sore when I moved it. He agreed, using a grey t-shirt tied together with some rope and a few knots, which I swear was designed to make me look like a war victim in a 3rd world country.
Anyway, my arm is better enough to type things now, which is good because it took me like 5minutes to brush my teeth with my left hand, and jars just couldn't be opened at all.
Next time I'm coaxed into being a motorized vehicle, it's going to be with Sully Sullenberger, or no ride at all.
Holidays
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Ghetto -- aka virtual homemade holiday card drawn in microsoft paint. Ah, only the best for my friends! Not that my holidays are un-ghetto or something. The "Christmas tree" at my apt is a chair w/ a green-ish blanket hanging over it. We added some LED's, strips of red Saran wrap, and earrings on it to make it look more authentic. Classiest of the classy.
Happy holidays :)
